>Be Jonah…AGAIN.
>Stood at the window overlooking the backyard with a cup of coffee.
>SIIIPPP
>It had been 3 months since that weird Daemon Hare showed up.
>The living room was thankfully fixed thanks to a little Gabby miracle, but she said the tv had to be burned.
>The couch was also fucked when she sneezed and accidently turned to wine.
>Apparently she can’t fix that.
>”I’LL TURN YOU INTO A PAIR OF SLIPPERS YOU FURRY LITTLE CUNT!”
>”I’d like to see you try hellspawn!”
>They were at it again.
>They had been at it, precisely every Friday at exactly 12pm for the past 3 months.
>It turns out Zaggy never figured out she had a set arrival time in those thousands of years of fighting. 
>Anyway since then, you made him stand out in the yard well away from the house every Friday at this time.
>And once more they were rolling about in the dirt, biting, stabbing, slashing and firing off weird holy/unholy blasts at each other.
>Good thing you have sunglasses now.
>You watch as Beezy as she is now called suplex Zaggy into the ground.
>Looked pretty painful.
>...
>SIIIPPP.
>At first you were worried for him, but after watching this play out week after week, you realize something.
>They’re both evenly matched idiots.
>Now it’s just become a mild form of entertainment to pass the time when you’re bored.
>You wince as Zaggy scrambles, picking up one of Francis’s gardening buckets and smash it across her face. 
>She staggers back and has no time to react as he tackles her to the ground.
>This is usually how it goes, back and forth between the two for about an hour before she slips away with a whole ‘I’ll get you next time!’ spiel.
>”What’s wrong Beezy? I thought you said you today was going to be the day you end me? Like last time and the past 30”
>Suddenly a tendril wraps around Zaggy’s leg and he’s flung across the yard.


>He slams into the tree with a nasty sounding crunch.
>You hope Francis’s tree house will be okay…oh and Zaggy too you suppose. 
>”I’ll use your skull as a fuckin drinking cup Zagzagel!”
>Oh yeah she was mad.
>Coughing up, a goblet of golden blood, Zaggy rises to unsteady feet.
>”That’s a new one at least. Well then *cough* come and take it.”
>With a snarl and murder in her eyes, she shoots forward at the speed of light.
>Somehow Zaggy moves, side stepping her.
>He’s so fast!
>He spins around, grabbing her by the shoulder and arm, he slams her hard against the tree, pinning her there.
>Nani?!


>Be Beelzebub
>Daemon Hare supreme
>Be pinned to a FUCKING tree by you’re most hated rival.
>This sucks.
>You’re feeling angrier and angrier, the blood boiling in your veins. 
>You struggle to move but his entire body is pressed against you.
>That stupid asshole.
>His grip is...firm, you don’t feel like you’re going anywhere.
>The smell of Vanilla fills your unholy nostrils. HIS scent.
>As he pants, you can feel his heart beating rhythmically through his chest against your back.
>His warm breath hits your neck as he tries steadying himself.
>It’s all so…pleasant.
>What, no!
>No it’s not!
>He’s an arrogant Angel!
>Your sworn enemy!
>Everything about him is…is terrible…and bad! But not in the bad way you are, which is good.
>A good bad but he’s a bad bad that is not good.
>Yeah…
>He leans in close, that scent growing stronger.
>”Give up Beezy, you’ve lost today.”
>His tone is quiet but commanding. A confident certainty to it.
>You feel goosebumps prickle up all across your skin and your fur ruffles.
>You shudder uncontrollably from the intense warmth as his breath tickles your ear.
>You hope he only took it as you trying to escape.
>This was feeling too weird now.
>Hell what is wrong with you?
>Wait a second…
>...
>This has be some kind of Angel trick!
>He’s casting some kind of spell to make you feel this way.
>That bastard!
>That’s it. You have to escape.
>”You know Beezy, maybe I won’t let you go this time. Maybe I’ll put a collar on you, keep you out of trouble.”
>”I-I-KILL YOUR SELF!”
>Oh Seven Hells why do you feel all tingly?!
>Nope, that’s it. You’re getting out of there.
>But he’s got you held pretty tightly…with that strong powerful body.
>Fuck…no, hang on, idea!
>Time to give him the ol Beezelbub special.
>You tense yourself up, readying for what’s about to come next.
>You have one shot at this.
>You grunt. “Eat shit and die you overgrown cottonswab! I’ve gotta bail, but I’ll be back. Maybe I’ll torch that nice little house of yours next time. I bet your human buddy cooks real good.”
>His eyes narrow, good, he didn’t like that, which means he’s distracted, surely you’ll escape now. It’s foolproof!
>You’re a genius Beezy-uh-Beezelbub!

>Be Zagzagel
>Be having to deal with your weekly Beezy problem
>Same as always. Nothing new
>Have her pinned face first against a tree.
>She’s writhing hard trying to escape but you won’t let her
>You tell her you’ll snap a collar on her just to piss her off
>It seemed to work
>Good
>You take a moment to picture it
>She’s sat there in an ornate chamber, a silver choker around that soft neck of hers, just a smidge too tight, causing some flesh and fur to bulge over the top and bottom
>She’s helpless
>No more harassing you
>No more having to put up with her bullshit
>Peace and quiet
>Heaven, she’d be at your mercy, you could do whatever you want…
>Your mind wanders
>You picture your hand gently caressing that neck, tugging on the chain and pulling her closer to you…You hold her face as you lean in and-
>”I-I-KILL YOUR SELF!” She yells, thrashing about
>In an instant the tables are turned. You’re lying in a black pit now
>Fire and smoke drifts all around you
>You have the collar on instead and she looms above you
>She yanks on the chain, pulling you up towards her before kicking you down onto your back
>The Daemon straddles your lap. Pulling the collar up so you’re forced to rest on your elbows for purchase
>There’s a sinister glee in those eyes
>The eyes of a predator toying with its prey before the kill
>As she runs a hand up the fur of your chest (where did your robes go?) a voice whispers in the back of your mind ‘Is this really so bad Zagzagel?’
>“Eat shit and die you overgrown cottonswab! I’ve gotta bail, but I’ll be back. Maybe I’ll torch that nice little house of yours next time. I bet your human buddy cooks real good.”
>You snap back to reality. And that’s why you hate her. She was always violent
>She would always use any dirty trick to get what she wanted, no matter who it hurt
>Daemon Hare scum
>As much as he would never admit it openly, if she or anyone else hurt his friends, be they angel or yes, even mortal, he would unleash the full wrath of the Heavens upon their blighted soul
>Just then a pair of insectoid wings burst from Beezy’s back, knocking you away. You were wondering when she was going to use those
>As she spun, ready to take flight, you were too fast for her
>”Maybe don’t announce you’re about to try and escape next time, huh?”
>As you slam her back against the tree by her wrists, body pressed to body, it takes several seconds before you two realize something
>...
>Your noses are touching!


>Be Zagzagel still
>You’re both frozen, eyes staring down as your Hare noses are booped together.
>This is beyond awkward
>Her skin feels red hot, no surprise there, and it’s through the charcoal sulfur smell she has is baked into her very flesh
>Honestly it stopped being unpleasant a good few thousand years ago
>You’re so used to it now, you’d find it strange if it ever left you
>She actually had a sort of pleasant barbeque smell now that he thought about it
>You both glance up at each other at the same time, eyes wide with shock
>You stare into those yellow orbs
>They were like a pair of glowing moons
>All the malice and anger they once contained was gone, instead there was…
>A sort of uneasy fear
>Could that be embarrassment?
>Truth be told, you felt a little weirded out yourself
>What was that burning sensation?
>It was your cheeks!
>You’re blushing Zagzagel!
>So was she!
>You both just…stand there
>Silently
>Suddenly you’re both moving
>You let go of her wrists, stepping away, looking off to the side sheepishly
>she brings her arms down, rubbing said wrists, eyes cast down
>You cough awkwardly
>”So…uh, next week again, huh?” You say, trying to make things feel more normal
>Um, yeah…” She replies
>Neither of you really move, stuck in your respective spots, nervously scratching the back of your head, or fidgeting with your fingers
>...
>...
>She punches you in the gut full force, causing you to double over coughing
>”That’s for saying you’ll put a collar on me asshole. I’ll be back next week to finish the job!”
>She points at Jonah, still stood at the window watching.
>”And I’ll get you too mortal! Why? I dunno, because you’re friends with cuntface over there!
>Jonah pulls a face and shrugs
>She begins to walk away, turning back to glance over at you, still writhing on your knees
>“Y-yeah!” Was all she said before her wings flit out and she buzzes off
>A few minutes later to limp back into the house, hand held to your stomach
>”What the hell was that all about?” Jonah asks
>You look over at him. “Ugh, Angel/Daemon Hare things Jonah, you wouldn’t get it.”
>”I’m…going to my room now. Don’t pester me, I need time to…recuperate”. 


>Be Beezelbub
>You’re lying on your bed in your Hellpit, body splayed out
>Staring up at the rocky ceiling
>”Fuck…”